date:
Saturday, February 25, 2006
oh ya... kinda having mixed feelings now.. really happy, really sad, and yet emotionless...okay... morn, went to make new specs... broke my current pair cause i stepped on it... =S yah.. that's what you do when you fumble to turn off that 'driving-you-crazy' alarm and in the process knock your specs onto the floor.. and you instinctively take a step back, and in the dark with a reallly slpy head, you don't realize the specs had fallen behind you.. and you step on them. okay so on the bright side, i get a new pair that looks much better.. it's like red, and half-rimmed.. so i gta be careful i don't step on them too! went for chem tuition and stoned thru 2 seemingly endless 2 hours, and went to beans to mug with martin and liy after.. was really crowded somehow, which is weird for a sat afternoon, so we had lunch at deli first.. haha okay so we shared ghost stories and all, scaring the crap out of each other=S haha! yup we finallly scored a long table at beans, but we were really full so we didn't get anything... and haha, we were really engrossed in chatting, we didn't realize an hour had passed while we sat there w/o anything. so the managers came to chase us! haha.. said customers complained=S okay so we got drinks, and all was good.yup.. liy left not long after, and so martin and i mugged.. like really! haha quite productive.. except i brought the wrong tys, lost my carbonyl notes, couldn't do num methods, and gave up on ode after qn 6=) haha least i tried! did a lil of everything.. ya around 8, jeff's friends left.. and zavier came too alone.. so i rounded them up to our table, so other customers had more space.. so nice right? lol =) yup and while i was the middlelink, i ended up feeling left out!! haha cause turned out they have a lot of friends in common=) oh well.. so expanded their social circles... =) oh and jeff gave me a really encouraging card and magnet too=) thanks so much!! really reflects on some things i'm gg thru~ although all 3 of them are new friends, like jeff and zavier 2 days old friends, and martin abt a mth... we really hit it off as a big group=)ya... so happy emos there. and ya.. jun rong called me up... she knows i'm thinking of quitting cell.. s we just talked..for abt 50 mins and 12 sec...so... was telling her how i was feeling and stuff.. abt cg and all... but somehow... instead of the usual sadness, i feel... detached... like... unaffected... it no longer bothers me, cause i've shut them out alr... so telling her all those stuff.. it's not really sharing my sorrows, but rather, updating of events and emotions.. okay.. really tired now.. i'll update soon~
kaela @
10:33:00 PM
date:
okok so so much happened! God has been so good, bringing so many pple to me to cheer me up and show concern, eunice, kelvin, wee hong, hong yi, ian, martin, xavier and his friend from pj, pris, qing, etc etc...oh they changed the guard at the gate, so though i finish lessons at 1150 , we had to stone till 110 in sch=S haha went home, showered and all, and headed to beans... yup... ian dropped by for awhile, and met stoner and passed him his shirt and all.. haha he got me this really cute dude that will grow grass hair for me to play with=)yup yup.. got to know quite alot of peeps tdy! oh the guy who gave me the note came tdy again! yup so we chatted up and his friend joined in.. haha really nice pple!! we just hit it off.. weird i didn't notice them earlier, sice they come quite regularly too... oh pris and lydia swung by too, and ilyas, and eunice..haha yup made many many new friends tdy! cause the sa guy added me on msn and we started chatting too! haha turned out jeffrey knows a whole lot abt me!! digging up my portfolio behind my back=S hehs=)okay so mayb my day doesnt sound much, but t was a really pleasant day, cause i mugged enjoyably, and i made new friends=) haha and i have a new thing to play with=) the hair plant=)and i know tmr will be a super day too! cause martin liy and i will be beaning after tuition, and i know my new pj and sa friends will be there too! oh my... we can trade notes!! haha, ac, pj, jj, nj, sa! how cool! haha and the beans guys are on shift tmr too! plenty of company=)
kaela @
12:23:00 AM
date:
Thursday, February 23, 2006
oookay.. feel so much better tdy... firstly, cause i took a day off from my books=)yup took permission slip to leave sch early... after chem prac and the test.. so abt 1.40 or so... went to meet stoney at the airport... haha i didn't know there's a viewing area where we can see planes take off and land! so cool=) haha so we just stood there and watched and chatted, amongst the group of old photographers=) yup.. but i didn't get to see any of the planes take off!! =S sigh... cept the BIRDS!! lol (inside joke) a so basically roamed the airport, made a whole lot of silly comments, and decided to stay overnight one day (the day between our one-week apart bdays), to celebrate our bdays! haha hope it works out !=)yup... after that we headed back to the west side... accompanied me down to tuition and all=) really sweet=) yup... one day w/o thinking abt unpleasant stuff, really puts my mind at ease... and though i didn't catch any slp, i feel much better than i had in days..yup so thanks stoney! for keeping me company and bringing me around! =)
kaela @
10:31:00 PM
date:
jons right... i'm really pathetic... think i should create a private blog so i won't scare pple who read my blog away...ya so what he said's true, everyone has the same amt of time i do, esp those in ac... yet they're managing fine.. so i should be too... and i shouldn't wallow in self-pity... so now.. i'm feeling upset with myself for being upset in the firstplace... i dunno what's wrong with me.. like some emotional spin or sth... so out-of control...and yes, since others are doing fine, why am i the only one who's spilling buckets of tears? i feel bad for bothering him, esp since we're not as close now... fell really lonely sometimes cause by mugging, i've shut out my close friends unknowingly.. like jon and qing and eunice... and the others are attached and all so i don't get to spend time with them...so ya... the problem lies with me... guess i'll need to spend time with myself and figure out what's really causing me to lose focus and all... and i gta learn to stop that tear duct from functioning. my eyes are small enough alr so i don't want them puffed up still.. =Soh shit i forgot tomug for chem test too. =S mug l8r i guess... really not in the mood to mug.. when's that fever coming?!
kaela @
12:45:00 AM
date:
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
ugh. getting a spot of headache.. and that ughsifying (as quoted from huimin) sore throat won't go away!! =Ssigh... okay been feeling a lil down these days... mainly over sch work and church stuff... sigh...went for my first econs tuition ytd... was pretty horrible... cause.. there were like 2 from rj, 1 from nj, 1 pj and another dunno from where.. yah so... they're like damn smart and all la! i couldn't even understand a single thing.. so i was always stuck at the qns, but they're always ahead and completing it!=S and they're like.. really selfish and all, like... really care abt themselves.. cause they've been in the same clas since jan, but they don't mingle, don't share notes, and don't even sit tgt! all sit with 2 or 3 chairs between each other!! sigh.. feel really slow in that class... super frustrated with myself...okay so tdy.. shorter day at sch... but i was stilll so slpy, though i made an effort to slp earlier! yah we disposed of the coconuts in class (finally) =)haha so funny.. pushing this cart of coconuts in sch=) haha so after sch went home, took 10 winks, showered and headed down to beans... pretty unproductive day... luckily had ian and martin as company!! sigh.. somehow the focus just isn't there... so much to be done.. in such a short period of time.. i feel kinda pressurzed... don't think i'm gna make it for terms! sighsighsigh... so marin left for tuition, ian went back home.. i took an aimless walk arnd wm but still felt down... need to go shopping i guess.. that's one thing that perks me up... but kinda tight on cash now.. but i seriously need to take a day and do sth to refresh myself! like... mayb ice-skating? shopping? tanning? or go for a movie and hit the arcade maybe.. thins i used to love doing, but nvr ever get the time or pple to do it with=(yah... feeling really exhuated.. sometimes i just feel like giving up really... like... really don't see the point! cause i try so hard, i take tuition, but i'm still not getting the grades... =S sigh.. so anw eunice came over and we chatted and cried tgt... she's a really good comforter =) reminded me not to lose faith in God.. and not to drift apart from Him... haha but teveryone was watching me unglam myself by crying buckets like a baby..ya and when i was leaving, alr at the mrt station, some guy came up and tapped me, saying i left sth behing in beans... he was sitting at the table opp me in beans.. tuened out to be a note of encouragement.. really sweet... and cause he didn't leave his name or anything, i can't thank him.. so... whoever you are, thank you!! it's really really sweet=)sigh... i hope things really tun for the better.. i'm gg crazy if this goes on... sigh...
kaela @
10:24:00 PM
date:
Monday, February 20, 2006
oh just wanted to thank you guys for all the encouragement you've given... thankyou darren for that one sweet video... couldnt resist smiling when i saw the similar pics of us being so 'down to earth' =)thank you GROWinthedark for reading my whines and encouraging me=)thank you pris darling, you've changed my life too!thank you Martin, for letting me know i'm not alone..thank you weehong, for making sure i get the rest i need=)thank you jon, for being worried and all, although i may disagree...ironically... the closest people are the one who don't notice... not that i blame them or anything.. just that... haha the irony is there! =S okay i'm not making much sense i guess...just wanted to let you guys know i appreciate the kind gestures=) i'll be fine. =)
kaela @
10:31:00 PM
date:
okay... so tdy.. we didn't have sch.. just went sch to watch a video on funorama, had chapel, prize giving for all sorts of stuff and announcements of coupon sales on fri.. typical assembly stuff.. after that, we went to count the coupons we collected on funorama day...
our games stall collected 1330, while the food collected 1500!! yup.. and the cost of the games stuff is like.. only 100? so we earned 1200!! yup not bad=) but 2sb4, the class that sold kenny roger's, earned 14400 worth for the foods stall!=S
oh so after we finished all the coupon counting and all, our class went for lunch at seoul gardens at taka! haha our most successful class outing so far! only chunpin, yue heng, xavier and randy were missing. the rest came!! haha was kinda fun la... i think funorama, although we did have many disagreements, still brought us closer somehow..
yup so after, just wandered anrd.. went to lib and kino... and headed to cb to mg.. but i was so tired.. so i ended up slping instead... and reading mags... =S oh well...
kaela @
9:30:00 PM
date:
Sunday, February 19, 2006
yawn... i'm really really exhausted now... actually i wanted to blog ytd!! but i fell aslp on the table instead while waiting for the pics to load=S and while i was smsing my friend=S ya fun-o-rama was extreme!okay firstly, i overslept! haha so typical! luckily chun called me up and woke me=) haha the first thing i noticed was how bright the sky was! yup so i rushed all the way to sch~ but i still reached before 9=)yup the stall was alr done up really nicely!! fishes were in the pool and all=) so after funorama was declared open, chun and i wandered arnd cause we werent on shift yet.. haha just bought like strawberry bubble tea and other foodstuff.. didn't get to look around too much.. went back to the stall, and it was like... totally packed!! and we had 2 booth's space!! haha somehow=S and luckily too! cause there awere just so many pple! ya so in the end, it was like no mre shifts.. just helped out all the way till 4 plus, counting timings and all till my throat got sore! ya it was so so popular, we had to reduce the time when we added goldfishes, and 1000 fishes were gone by 12 plus=S didn't even have to use to guessing game! ya and the plastic bags ran out too!=S... haha was like super tired.. and had a really bad headache.. guess it was from the lack of slp, and the hot sun!=)okay martin and liy came down, so arund 4 when i took my break i went around with them to spend my coupons..bought alot of funny stuff la=) ya and went back to busy again... eunice and the others came too... but i was so busy i didnt even know... until sarah came to tell me she saw them.. sigh i feel really really bad...and i didn't really get to hang arnd with darren too! i know he made an effort to come, cause he couldn't at first! =S sigh i'm so so sry peeps..ya so all in all... it was a pretty exhausting day.. really busy and all.. i think it's funner than jj's love fiesta last yr, for those who came anw.. for pple at booths, not so much.. cause last yr i had plenty of time to visit other stalls and all... ya so we packed up and left pretty late... and i lost my fav pair of silver slippers!! i think someone dumped it acc... sigh... okay i'm gg to blog abt sth close to my heart that's really boring and not nice at all, so... time to click that back button or sth ok?=)okok so tdy, it was svc early in the morn, and i went to mug at cb after... with cons and ian... was so super tired, i just slept and slept and slept... and i was really grouchy... so when jon called me abt the cgm stuff, i was kinda irritated with the change in plans... and junrong came on the phone and scolded me... sigh....i'm so so tired of cg actually.. many many times i feel like just quitting cg... like... what's the point? i don't see it helping change my life,m except take up a whole bunch of time, cause they're always so draggy and longwinded=S other cgs are really straight to the point! ours is like so... long and draggy.. and always delayed...and i really didnt want to sign up for ministry this yr cause of A's.. it's like... i end sch so late, and i have tuition and i go for svc and cell, and i have to mug... i hardly have time for myself alr!! much less go for ministry... but junrong signed me up=S sigh... i'm gg to be so exhausted...feel kinda lonely these few days... cause... like ian says, i'm just a social butterfly.. don't have any real close friends... those who are close.. are really busy.. like attached, or just busy with sch stuff and all... liike the closest pple to me now..are my family... if i didn't have them, i'd probably br feeling so lost now... okay feeling so emo now...ya i guess... it's cause i've been to busy with sch stuff and all.. i don't get the chance to catch up with my brsties, esp since we're in diff schs... and pple from my sch... are so separated... like... close at sch, apart after sch... and it'ss like.... i'm feeling so empty inside... and i can't see my purpose in life.. junrong is right, i can't shine for God or be a tetimony... my results are horrendous, and i don't have many strong relationships in my life, except for my family... and i feel like a failure sometimes, cause no matte how hard i try, things just don't seem to work out... i'm really worried cause terms are coming up... i can't afford to do like last yr... but i feel so so tired sometimes... and... i realized i don't have a single person to talk to abt my sadness... cause either we're not close, or they're really busy and i don't want to bug them with my silly problems.. so i blog.. cause few people read so it's safe i guess... and i always mug outside, so i only see my family at night... so i feel really lonely most of the time... and i'm thinking of quitting cg too... cause... i don't feel close to anyone there at all.. and... i don't want that extra pressure... and i feel left out when i see others getting so into God's presence, and i'm feeling like an empty vessel...emptiness and loneliness... that deep well i have inside that weighs my heart down...for those of you who read till this point, i'm so so sry if i brought up sadness in you..
kaela @
11:30:00 PM
date:
Friday, February 17, 2006
haha tmr's fun-o-rama!! yay!!haha no lessons tdy, everyone's busy setting up and preparing for tmr! amos, ced, huimin jie and i were frantically transporting pails of water to our pool, a really cute and colourful one=) yup okay and amos, (that clumsy oaf =) ) spilled a pail on my shoes=S so my shoes and socks were entirely wet!! haha borrowed huimin's slippers to wear, which were super super big, so i look really hilarious=)hmmm oh ya turned out another class, 1sc3, had a banner with the same words as ours!! - where's the fish! ya we got a shock la. in the end, they put apostrophes on their fish, cause theirs isn't fishing real fishes, but rather, magnetic fishing... haha but now our stickers promote for them!! heh=)so ya.. pretty hectic day... added sequins to our banner,drew stickers, filled water, and.... painted shoes!! haha yup we bought velcro shoes like the one on the funorama shirt!! and we painted them into identical replicas.. right to the smileleys 100% acjc original=) and even have our names at the back=) really cute=) but they dont have my size=S so i had to get from bata - twice the price and not as nice...=S quite kiddyish=Ssigh... funorama seems to be really getting pple more tense.. like everyone wants it to work out.... their way! sigh... like alot of unhappiness and disagreements... makes me uncomfortable... cause we're a class and we're supposed to stay united! don't like it when pple start getting pissed with each other... cause in the end, nth gets done, and everyone's uncomfortable...oh well.. gg to fo the poster and draw more stickers1 hope funorama18th will be a total success!=) updates l8r!! =)
kaela @
11:45:00 PM
date:
Thursday, February 16, 2006
okay i'm really exhausted!!!no lessons again tdy=S haha but i've been rushing around since i woke!! haha overslept, so rushed to get ready... rushed into sch hall just in time... had pccg, and at theb start of math lec and rushed down to pasas qing the tshirt money=S... and after math i rushed to pass dom his funorama coupons and money cause he had to rush for lecture...yup after that we went out to sell funorama coupons... hmmm... i think the funorama's making everyone tense and all... like.. somehow there seems to be quite alot of arguments and unhappiness or disagreements in classs... like eugene and gabriel were shouting at each other, staring at each other and all... quite scary actually... cause they're usually quite good friends... and i think there was some disagreement between the 4 girls abt gleneagles and suntec too... and even xianming, jieying and huimin seem to be unhappy with each other, even though it isn't that obvious... chunpin noticed it too... oh i really hope we'll be able to pull through all this... after all, we're a class, and we've been tgt for nearly a year alr...okay so the 4 girls, qing, randy, yue heng, chun and i went to suntec... the rest to gleneagles... sarah and ced went home, and chngpeng and euguene went for coffee=) oh speaking of coffee, i bought a bottle from starbucks! really like it=)haha i've really been blowing of alot of money! hmm was pretty bad at the start, cause sb1's teacher found out we went to suntec and scolded mdm pang... cause she only wanted her clas to sell there... hmm but AD2 was there too!! yaya but mdm pang told us to sell anw, so we got passes and sold outside carrefour... sales pretty slow at the start, but began picking up as lunch hour kicked in=) i was the supposed 'bag-watcher' ! haha brought them in to ben and jerry's cause jon and wuch and all were there so got them to help to take care while i helped the others... oh and we met this guy, old ac boy, from sb1.. he knew ms marhaini too, and she still has his student pas! cause of his hair! haha=) so in the end we managed to sell abt $340 worth of coupons!! so proud of our class=)yup so yueheng treated us to ben and jerry's ice cream after=) andi introduced the others 9 funky and extremly indulgent flavours of b n j=) haha used to eat when i visited cheryl last yr! haha yup=) after that we rushed back to sch... haha we were so exhausted fron the coupon selling we were all sound aslp on the train on the journey back! luckily chun got a msg and woke up just in time=)okay so back in sch, we did some planning of stuffs to bring tmr, and drew some stickers and all... didnt get to do much cause the cleaner came to lock up hte class... so we left 2 hours l8r, and i headed down for math tuition... okay byt hen i was alr drained off, so i slept the whole journey there... and so had math tuition, where i forced myself awake, and yup, reached home an hour ago to take my dinner=) haha.got to do up thefunorama stickers l8r too... and kelvin's sis's present... sigh.. hope we can finish quickly tmr... there's so much to be done!! plus i'll be helping kel with the pres, and i'll have to mug too cause i havent exactly been having alot of effective periods in the past week or so.. gotta catch up on tuts and all...oh yay i got my pink funorama shitrt tdy=) really really super=) haha=)oh i just hop we'll be able to go through preparations tmr w/o any major disagreements in class...
kaela @
10:24:00 PM
date:
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
haha i feel like i havent been schling for quite awhile... cause mon, we went to ntu to try to sell coupons, and it didn't work out so we went to paint our banner instead at chunpin's coid deck=) quite fun la=) went cb after to pass kel apple's cards and his vday gift=) had bs after that at bb macs...okays and tues, valentine's day!! haha pretty slck day la cause only had abt 3 effective periods=) flowers, balloons, chocs and candy everywhere=) haha i received my biggest every choc bar=) half pound of hershey's milk choc!! heh all the cookies and chocs=) gna get tooth decay=) haha but quite sad, cause i didnt have a valentine=S haha but i have lovely friends=) and a lovely family=) that's enough love to last a lifetime=)hmmm as for tdy.. short day la.. and we touched up on the banner... went cb after to mug... haha saw so many pple!! hmm eunice, shao, minjun, alvin, ian, xin miao and friends, pris, kel, hongyi, hilda, cons... haha=) but i'm really exhausted tdy... think it's cause i've been actively running arnd alot, staying up to prepare vday stuff and mugging econs... which reminds me, i'm sad to say i'm screwed=S ya and i have a severe backache... must b e cause of the bending over to paint banners=S heh=)ohoh can't wait for funorama!!
kaela @
10:59:00 PM
date:
Sunday, February 12, 2006
hmmm... v day's around the corner... seems like the singles are luckier though.. the couples seem to be having problems in their relationships.. hmmm do relationships at our age last? i always thought not, so i didn't want to get into any, since it wouldn't last anw... and yes, i'll probably be spending this yr's vday with my fellow bachelorettes=) haha spinster club=)haha okay i'm feeling like an evaluatist (if there's such a word), so i'll be doing alot of crapping =)hmm okay getting attached can be really fun, but it takes alot of committment and communication for it to keep gg on.. as time goes by, you'll start to find out the negative sides of each other, so there'll come in the acceptance factor... and even so, u have to give each other space, yet still show care and concern regularly.. and ya, we have to balance between our friends and our partners... oh that's really tough... esp if your besties don't get along with him.. =S haha relationships are so tedious..plus there are some guys who refuse to allow their gfs to contact guys, go to guys places, and most ridiculously, to not go online=S okay so there are merits too, like there's someone to see you home, someone to msg who's obliged to reply instantly, and someone to cheer you up and encourage you 24/7... and u'll feel really loved and special=)hmmm... okay updates.. i've officially been termed 'mugger' and 'nerd'... thanks to martin and kelvin=S haha to prove them wrong, i went towning ytd!! haha met up with dear pris, and we took crazy pics=) oh she bought me really nice earrings too!! haha love ya babe!! =) yup went to didi's stall after... and blew 20 bucks on a h/p pouch=S but it was love at first sight!! *protests* haha even didi said i was crazy to buy it.. and she was selling it!! haha=) got it anw=) it's like denim, jeans material, with the brown frays at the bottom, and it's like a long jean skirt with lil pockets... and haha pink flowers on it, with pink fabric paint in swirly designs... haha it was a 'must-get'!yup tdy after svc, went to cb.. and finished all the 12 presents=) haha for vday!! for my beloved, and new friends=) haha i like it cause i can hold all 12 in one hand=) really not space consuming=) haha we're gg to ntu to sell coupons tmr.. and everyone's planning to zao=) so typical=)
kaela @
9:10:00 PM
date:
Friday, February 10, 2006
i'm so proud of my 3 darling juniors!haha didn't paint banner tdy, so after school, went to look for them at holland V, and went off to dunearn with them... haha i was so nervous for them!! couldn't sit still! haha ended up standing, and ilyas said i was kiasu=S heh=)so qianqi got 14, noel with 10 (5 dist), and dom with 9 points!! (5 dist!) haha so so happy for them=) my lovely juniors will be back rocking ac with me=) oh the only down side, this batch didn't manage to beat ours... =S oh and i realize i can't play the guzheng anymore.. went to the music room where the guzheng were.. my juniors were preparing for some performance... and i tried playing my syf song from 2 half yrs back... after 3 notes i gave up=S heh=)haha so after the results episode, went on to cb with ilyas... had to mug a lil... yup but ilyas and i ended up chatting and gossiping=) heh.. zhen guang dropped by for awhile, oh and ian too~ haha oh well... time seems to be passing really really fast! 28 days to terms=S YES 28!! so all u acsians reading this, dig out your books and start mugging!!!!sigh... actually i'm quite pathetic, cause i'm just a 3 subber now, not taking any s paper, or mep... an i'll prob not score straight A's, so i might just be a 1 distinction case=S ilyas was telling me how some pple can get 10 dists!! like 4 subber, 4 S paper, music and higher chi... sighsighsigh... hope my juniors leave a better legacy..
kaela @
11:12:00 PM
date:
Thursday, February 09, 2006
oh just made a discovery... i realise i like break-up songs! didn't notice the trend.. i like sad, lost songs too... okay i guess it's the 'awww' lyrics that touch our hearts... but of course, i like happy songs too, and songs with beautiful meaningful words..okay list of my fave songs:happy ones: some hearts, colourblindmeaningful ones with beautiful lyrics: i hope you dance, glory of love, photograph, don't forget to rmb, jesus take the wheelsad breakup songs(eng): email my heart, because of you, only love, have you ever, sad breakup songs(chi): jay's ye qu, duan le de xuan, hui dao guo qu stef sun's liao jie, wo bu nan guohaha see what i mean? lol.
kaela @
11:38:00 PM
date:
haha great day in all... oh and thanks peeps, feeling much better ya=)hmmm only went for 1st 2 periods, before heading over to dunearn with joel, dominic and qian qi... noel went to tj with his class=S haha journey there was quite crazy cause joel and the others were ganging up against me.. and yes, joel was hitting me!! so ungentlemanly=S heh=) okay so we sold quite alot of coupons i guess... to the lower sec, with ilyas's help, some upper secs, and lots of teachers! haha=) oh realized i dunno a lot of pple there now... haha although some juniors claim to recognise me (mayb from that peer tutoring video) heh=)yup.. so after the human flow died down, we just chilled out at the canteen cause it was raining... took lotsa photos=) haha ilyas was telling us how crazy his class is.. =) okay so after that we went to west mall, dom did his tx card thing, qianqi got her friend's present, and we just chilled out at cb... haha ilyas joined us after awhile... and we were just gossiping and chatting away...feels reallly good...to hang out with new faces, but close ones, cause we're all ex-dunearnites, and from acjc=) okay cept they're all from band=S haha yup...best of all, i got to miss chem prac, econs lec, and pe=) yay=)oh O level results are coming out tmr... feel excited for my juniors=) most prob be gg down to witness their pride=)hmmm... recently there's just been this well of thoughts and feelings in me... thinking back to last yr when i was still at jj.. seem pretty long ago yet not so... oh and i've decided to go solo this vday, not gg to rent-a-bf =) i'll stay home and watch dvds with my ac bear=)oh well chem test tmr... have to go a-mugging!!
kaela @
11:20:00 PM
date:
Wednesday, February 08, 2006
sigh econs econs... i feel like i know nth abt this chap... no matter how many times i go through my notes, i still draw up a blank when i see the questions=S oh okay self-whining below, not interesting, so avoid to prevent complete boredom~i don't know why, but 10 mins ago i was hit with this extreme sadness... like i just found this emptiness.. suddenly i don't see the point of trying so hard... last year was a major flop, my worst ever... with torture from mdm pang, leaving chem class with a broken spirit, my horrendous grades, separation from sec sch friends in jj, separation from my beloved grandad, arguments between my parents cause mdm pang called them, getting sent to mdm tham twice, feeling that sense of extreme loneliness, backslided from God, and not seeing any direction for my life...and all of a sudden, it all rushes back.. sure i had a great day, not gg to sch, meeting chun and ced to get mc at bb polyclinic, met good old friend weixuan and went a lil shoopping with him, ian and martin came down to study with me at cb, met long-time-no-see kiong and his gf, saw siewteng too, and eunice... oh and constance right before i left.. laughed alot, really. havent felt happier in days... i've even tried to improve by not cutting sch as frquently, only if i have a really really good reason like tdy.. cause i didn't want to go for xcountry which ends super late... it's the only day i've ponned this year, apart from cny celebs. last year, i'd cut class once a week cause i was scared of sch and mdm pang...i've really been trying much harder this year... but can't seem to see any change happening... in fact, i feel more discouraged, cause i've tried and learnt that i can't do it... it doesn't help that i don't like the subs i'm doing.. i'm doing them cause i don't have a choice... my results arent any diff from last year's... and i feel bad for wasting my parents' money on tuition...how i miss the days when ah qiu and i could hang out at bk after sch and just idle chat and all till evening, days where we'd all watch movies tgt, go ice-skating, go swimming... i don't ever have time for all these now... my friends seem to be doing okay though... juggling sch, cca, boyfriends, fun all easily... i can't even handle the sch part, so i have to forgo the rest...and while jon, jo, and eunice all seem to be growing spiritually, i can't even do regular qt or bs... makes me feel so ... i dunno... er undisciplined? and behind.. and till now, i don't know how i'm gg to shine for Him, cause i can't think of a single accomplishment i've made since last year... sure sec 4 was my proudest ever, but thereafter... it's a totally different story...if i could, i'd travel back to the time when i was 5, doing performances on stage with my friends for childrens day, with my parents watching below, smiling... but i'm 18... and such simple pleasures arent available for me anymore...
kaela @
9:57:00 PM
date:
Sunday, February 05, 2006
haha okay the most unimaginable thing happened=Searlier in the day, after chem tuition, i went for cgm... okay although i did miss a bus stop, i managed to find my way to junrong's house=) okay with martin's help=) yup so.. we had games, and we played this 7ip game, where each person will in turn say a number in sequence, but when it comes to a number containing 7, or a multiple of 7, that person has to say 'up!' instead of the number.. piece of cake right? WRONG. i messed up thrice. and the forfeit? the rest got to draw on my face with lipstick - a terrible dark red shade, with glitter=S okay and they weren't exactly miss mercifuls=Syah went to cb to mug a lil, before gg to aunt's house =) oh yay got to play with munchies, the super adorab;\le and cuddly rabbit=) soft white fur, droopy grey years, twitching nose.. simply irresistable=) makes you go 'oooh ' and 'ahhh' =)
kaela @
12:56:00 AM
date:
Saturday, February 04, 2006
okay tdy's chu 7!! ren ri=) - meaning everyone's birthday... so ahem, i'll be coming around to collect my presents! =) heh=)okay one more thing, BUY ACJC FUN-O-RAMA COPONS from me!! i have a whole bunch to sell, so come support us okay? =) happening on sat, 18th feb from 930 to 6=) expect our delectable delicacies and challlenging games=) loads of fantastic prizes to be won!! coupons are transferrable, so if you can't come, bless someone else with it! =) yup coupons come in slips of $10 each, contact me at 97734119 if you're interested=)okay now that i'm done with advertising... heh=)okay thurs was a pernormal thurs, with chem prac(yucks) and math tuition..yup so ytd after sch, went back to dunearn, and managed to catch the teachers this time.. asked mr wong for permission to set up a booth to sell ac coupons, and chatted with some juniors.. oh yah iilas is working as a relief cum history teacher in dunearn!! haha how cool.. like 65 a day for 3 hours??!!! that's crazy... haha he knows nuts about history actually=) yup.. sae ms sandra gwee there too, but she seemed pretty laid back, different from the sandra gwee in ac, since she can't give devotions here now... yup... chattted up woth some teachers too.. hmmm went home, took a quick shower and headed to cb to mug=S yup did some integration... eunice joined me after too so it wasn't so bad=) oh well gta rush off for chem tuiition now! =)
kaela @
9:36:00 AM
date:
Wednesday, February 01, 2006
oh it's wed alr... time flies really fast these days=Shmmm... monday was chu er, so i went to visit the relatives on my dad's side, and my godmother...wed.. went to have dim sum at neptune with my family, den shopped arnd a lil at taka...went home to slack, den met up with eunice to go esplanade... yup we ate at this jap restaurant there, matt's courteousy=) until pretty late... got home arnd 12...okay so sch tdy, finally caught memoirs of a geisha... not too bad, cept they cut a whole lot... yup tdy's ian's bady, so his treat at cb after=) oh shucks think i'm gaining a lot this cny.. keep eating and eating... shark fin's soup coming up soon..=S my aunt's bringing it over... yes at this hour=S.. how not to gain weight? =S shucks and there's swim pe tmr roo=S everyone's gna see the extra balloon i've gained... =S oh no oh no...don't really feel like schooling tmr actually... cause there's chem prac... and i have math tuition after swim pe=S *big groan* =S
kaela @
10:28:00 PM